I'm taking a gamble. I'm taking a risk. I'm running the chance that I could end up right back where I began, broken, unhealed, depressed and unhappy. It's a risk I'm ready to take because the alternative is something I can't live with any longer. I deserve to heal, to be right in my own skin, heart and mind. We all do, even if it's only fleeting because that's all we can really ask for each day, isn't it?
We are living, breathing, feeling creatures and we need to know we are not in this alone. Fear of feeling alone is death, death to our spirit, death to our psyche, death to our hope. I will always wish I could have done more to ease my father's pain and suffering while he waited out death those final, lonely days in a nursing home, but a disease like Parkinson's will always have the upperhand. While I still am here on this earth, the most I can hope for is to love me and take care of my very essence that connects me to this world. It is my hope that I can create a space that demonstrates how we can love ourselves and others at our very lowest points just as equally as we can love ourselves when we emerge and find our peaks of stability and joy. We are the makers of our own happiness, and sometimes, we just want peace, quiet or contentment and that's okay, too.